The Ultimate Blueprint for Thriving in Love
The Ultimate Blueprint for Thriving in Love
The Ultimate Blueprint for Thriving in Love
The most comprehensive program for overcoming relationship crisis, transcending stuck patterns, and rebuilding trust.
Crisis to Connected™ is the only course of its kind. It not only shows you exactly how to break through gridlock and crisis in your relationship but how to communicate, connect, and repair –it's the ultimate blueprint for thriving in love.
Before I Tell You All About This Transformative Program, Let’s Talk About Who This Is For…
You’re a couple or individual committed to bringing your best self to the relationship, and you get that love is not always easy
You’re not a quitter, but you’re tired of having the same old fight(s), feeling alone in your marriage, and like you can’t move forward, but you can’t go back. You want a smart, evidence–based approach that results in change because (hard as it is) you get there’s an opportunity in the tough stuff.
- A couple in crisis –dealing with major challenges, like a recent betrayal or deal–breaker decisions. You’re stuck in a vortex of blame, fighting, shutdown, and hopelessness. You feel you’ve tried everything and are at a breaking point.
- An individual with a reluctant or ambivalent partner who is unresponsive to your concerns, complaints, and needs; who does not keep core agreements; who is currently (or chronically) threatening to leave, shutting down, or leaning out of the relationship.
- A couple who agrees something must change. You love each other but no longer love being partnered with each other. While you’re not necessarily fighting, you’re bored –without spark. You want to roll up your sleeves and see what’s possible. You get that crisis is not always loud, that love can die from a thousand cuts as easily as it can die from one swift blow.
You’re in the right place, and I’m going to tell you exactly how Crisis to Connected™ will give you the knowledge, tools, and confidence necessary to support you on your journey to getting unstuck and loving well.
By the end of this program, you will have:
- Serious relationship superpowers. You’ll know how to set boundaries AND be kind. How to channel courage where previously fear, shame, and hopelessness dominated. You’ll be a better partner, parent, friend – a better YOU.
- Science–backed knowledge in all things Love. You’ll know what makes relationships succeed, what makes them fail, and (most importantly) how this applies to your relationship.
- Clarity. No more relationship–limbo–hell. No more gridlock. You’ll identify core values and get clear on what’s possible and what’s not, laying the foundation for healthier decisions, peace, joy, and even passion.
- A plan that leaves no stone unturned. You’ll cover all of the bases, including healing past hurts, addressing underlying issues, strengthening your weaknesses, rebuilding trust, and amplifying friendship and positivity.
- A shared story. A narrative you co–create on how you got from your lowest point back to your highest. No more fighting over me versus we.
- An agreement. A contract. A map for how you want to live, love, and move forward in health and mutuality. A commitment to yourself and to your partner that transcends this moment, reactivity, and crisis.
Join me in Crisis to Connected™
“I love your course Kerry, I think it has saved us.”
What’s Inside Crisis to Connected™
Here’s why it pays to learn from an expert. I know exactly where most couples get stuck, and in turn, I know exactly what it takes to get unstuck. In this module, we’re going to cover each of the common relationship offenses that take couples down, that over time ultimately cause heartbreak, an inability to move forward, and fractured families.
What I’m known for is taking the best–of–the–best, curating gold-standard science-backed concepts, and fusing them into one comprehensive approach that is more effective and lasting than any solo technique you’ll find anywhere.
We’ll start with a thorough review of relationship offenses the big ones and the little ones – the overt and covert, with the end goal of helping you achieve total clarity on how your relationship got here and what it will take to not only survive, but thrive.
I’m going to teach you everything I teach my private clients, including the most toxic and damaging behaviors couples often unknowingly commit. I’m confident and passionate that knowledge is power. We’ll get you fluent in the language and concepts necessary to empower you –you’ll have choices, ideas, and information that is game-changing for love.
- Develop a thorough understanding of the most relationship damaging behaviors, thoughts, and actions correlated with divorce (and poor health, addiction, and mental health problems to boot) and get a pulse on how these manifest uniquely in your relationship.
- Discover core vulnerabilities that have (likely) dogged you for ages. Not only will this give you new insights, but it will also serve as a catalyst for change, so you’ll finally be free of repeating toxic cycles that undermine your relationship(s).
- Experience a paradigm shift that affords you new opportunities and choices. You’ll feel hope where previously you felt stuck and (most importantly), the beginning glimmers of connection (to yourself and in turn, to your partner).
“This online course resulted in more breakthroughs in understanding my partner than years of therapy had previously accomplished.”
I know it may sound crazy, but in the end, I believe our relationship’s health comes down to one primary tenant – how we navigate (real or imagined) heartbreak and loss. Because fears of disconnection, intimacy, rejection, loneliness, and dependence ultimately drive our reactivity and perpetuate pain (think self-fulfilling prophecy).
We’ll start Module 2 by getting clear on core values and strategies for walking the talk. Who do you want to be, not just at your best but at your worst? You’ll learn how to simultaneously shoot for better and give yourself permission to be human and muck up –mastering the art of embodying accountability and compassion with both yourself and with your partner.
Next, we’ll call a truce. Why a truce? Because while your relationship is in limbo or crisis, making never-ending permanent agreements often makes things worse. What you need is a set of temporary agreements that allow you to cool things down, buy some time, and build skills, then you can tackle the big decisions.
Finally, you’ll roll up your sleeves, commit to implementing your knowledge into action, and lay down your weapons of blame. You’ll be free to focus on what you can control versus what you can’t, and as a result, lay the groundwork for influencing your partner and your life in ways you never imagined.
- Lay the foundation for getting more of what you want in your relationship and less of what you don’t want by creating a mutual and positive feedback loop instead of the gridlocked conversations that leave you depleted, hopeless, and lacking trust.
- Cultivate courage and dare to change. Your newfound knowledge and clarity will have you taking calculated risks and trying new things. Love must grow or die, and for relationships to grow (particularly during challenging times), we must cultivate new practices intentionally –by bringing our best selves to our worst stuff.
- Get your comprehensive map to guide you through heartache and provide much-needed support where you’ve previously felt alone. Heartache is a natural byproduct of love, of life. It’s there in all relationships. What makes heartache worthwhile (and tolerable) is connection –to self, our partner, and humanity. This terrain has been well-traveled; no need to go it solo –I’ll be with you every step of the way.
“I wish I could give this course to every couple for a wedding/commitment present! It was like a highly practical college course in couple’s communication.”
Here’s what science tells us: If you go down, your partner goes down. If your partner goes down, you go down. Most importantly, if either of you goes down enough times, ultimately, the relationship goes down. How to simultaneously have your partner’s back and have your own is a skill few have mastered.
In this module, you’ll get on the fast-track for calming chaos and minimize your vulnerabilities to being hijacked by fight-or-flight reactivity. You’ll learn concrete, evidence-informed tools that will have you calming yourself AND your upset partner. You’ll get skilled at choosing the when and how of your battles. And as a result, minimize the likelihood of misunderstandings and fights to seemingly erupt out of nowhere.
We will cover common core differences that couples navigate. Over time, when we don’t understand our differences, we experience amplified distress, misperceptions, and long-term damage to connection, trust, and friendship. A little knowledge can go a long way in mitigating injuries and healing wounds caused by these differences.
Most importantly, you will learn to lead with relief. How to bring calm to conflict. How to take breaks effectively and (important) how to get back in the arena and do it right.
- Discover the most effective ways to calm yourself when it counts –when you’re hijacked by rage, despair, fear, shame, or shutdown.
- Discover the most effective ways to calm your partner when it counts –where previously you felt ineffective, like nothing you do matters like it’s “never good enough.”
- Create a blueprint of your relationships’ physiological strengths and struggles. Identify where you are most likely to miss each other’s signals, the ways you alarm each other, and communicate threat (often unknowingly). Anticipate how this sets you up to falter on your agreements and commitments –to fall into the same old traps.
- Become a Master-Regulator. Being able to handle difficult feelings (in yourself or your partner) ultimately sets you up for success. You’ll be able to navigate conflict and uncertainty with confidence –setting the stage for successful relationships with family, friends, and even colleagues –healthy relationships really do change the world.
“This course is extremely well-researched, straightforward, practical, and brilliantly direct.”
I’m going to let you in on a secret: contrary to what many couples therapists and relationship experts would have you believe, there’s no magic bullet. This stuff is do-able, concrete, and effective.
In fact, you likely already have many of the necessary skills you’ll need to radically improve your present situation; you just don’t know how to harness them. For example, most of us can pluck a string, but it does not mean we can play the guitar. To play the guitar, we need to pick up the instrument daily, master a basic repertoire of notes and chords, build up a little tolerance to making mediocre music and break songs down into small and learnable bits. It’s the same with communication skills.
- Learn from the masters. There is no need to reinvent the wheel. The research of John Gottman and Brene Brown gives us a map. The tools from Stan Tatkin and Brent Atkinson enhance it. When we follow their lead, the destination it promises to take us to is nothing short of awe-inspiring.
- Become influential where previously you were ineffective. When faced with upset, most of us tend to either not stand up for ourselves adequately (and walk around silently seething) OR stand up for ourselves in excess (and blow things up). We don’t realize there is a sweet spot where conflict is win-win; here’s where I will teach you how to walk the delicate balance between exerting influence and accepting influence.
- Set boundaries skillfully. Knowing how to stand up for yourself is no small feat; I would even argue it’s a superpower, and like all superpowers, it takes time to master. What we know from the research is that the most boundaried people are also the most compassionate. You can be soft and strong, flexible and boundaried.
- Master the critical art of Repair. Here’s the deal, Gottman’s Masters of Marriage often fight as much as the Disasters, but what makes them stand out and thrive is they know how to make up. They are skilled and versed in a range of techniques that allow them to not only tend to bumps and ruptures but heal them.
- Stop drawing invisible lines in the sand. You’ll learn how to honor core promises and values you’ve identified for yourself. How to not do business as usual and throw your heart under the bus when faced with a partner who chronically betrays, breaks agreements, and does not accept influence from you.
“After many failed attempts with couples counseling/therapists, I found this course much more effective and informative. The content and resources are right on point. I highly recommend C2C.”
It’s normal to struggle with communication and conflict problems in any relationship, but not every couple grapples with “detours.” I like to think of the detours as the extras that hit particular couples; Extras like chaos, untreated mental health challenges, active addiction, unresolved betrayals, crises of commitment, or a history of trauma.
The Six Detours is a brand new module in C2C. It addresses what I believe is a critical gap (and need) in the field of couples therapy —to support you with the vulnerabilities and challenges inherent in the detours. Such difficulties are hard enough on their own and amplified further due to the stressors COVID19 has placed on many.
The detours often go untreated. Did you know that many couples therapists will screen you out if untreated addiction, mental illness, or an unresolved affair is present in your relationship? I believe that all couples need support, especially couples with the detours. So if you fall in this camp, know I’ve got your back, that I understand the detours are the very reason you need help, and that I’ve built resources to support you regardless of if your partner is on board.
In Module 5, you will learn how to identify which detours are impacting your relationship and gain access to essential assessment tools and resources to facilitate healing individually and as a couple. Because the thing about detours is they complicate love; Like smoke, they obscure what’s possible and who you are as a couple once the smoke clears. They erode friendship and damage trust, and pretty soon, you forget why you fell in love, and you wonder if healing is possible.
- Identify which problems are yours to own and which are your partners and understand what to do with these insights so you can move forward and end gridlock.
- Free yourself from the role of fixer and one-directional dynamics characteristic of relationships lacking in mutuality. Build on ways to be clear and kind to support your relationship so that you have the best shot at healing.
- Gain clarity on what has dogged you forever, the problems you bring into the relationship, and that will (likely) follow you if you do not address them and decide to leave.
- Learn how to be accountable and compassionate with yourself if you are struggling with a detour. For your relationship to heal, it’s essential to not collapse into a “shame-storm,” to learn how to be 100% responsible for your actions and simultaneously be kind to yourself.
- Clarify what your bottom line is and how to handle situations when that line gets crossed. Learn how to trust your partner to “handle it” and venture into unchartered waters that previously terrified you.
“Incredible class, amazing, hard work, painful at times but worth every bit of effort. If you work hard and do the work, your relationship will be rewarded many times over.”
Ever wonder why you keep having the same conversation(s) over and over again? Why it can feel like a different day but the same argument? It’s because wounds not healed by time go into the long-term memory of your relationship.
The vast majority of us think of infidelity when we contemplate betrayals that damage trust in a marriage. But the reality is there are many ways you can break trust and cause lasting damage to your relationship. Some injuries result from frequent and tiny wounds (think death by a thousand cuts), and others are a massive blow. Either way, when left unrepaired, the damage accrues, and your relationship becomes infected. Ultimately, these unresolved issues reach a tipping point, and your relationship goes into a full-blown crisis.
In Healing From Betrayals, we will take a deep dive into what exactly constitutes a betrayal, and of equal importance, we will explore how to heal these past hurts. I’ve seen again and again well-intentioned people make earnest attempts at repair only to have their partner continue to feel hurt and angry. Most of the time, these repairs fail not for lack of love but lack of know-how.
In Module 6, I’m going to teach you everything I know about how to clean out old wounds, prevent the likelihood of future recurrence, and rebuild trust so that your relationship has a solid foundation to build on.
Learn what constitutes a betrayal. We will go over the big ones and the small ones. We will examine what sets the stage for betrayals to occur, exploring core vulnerabilities in your relationships that led to the likelihood of your trust eroding.
Next, we’ll go step-by-step through the three phases that must happen for healing from betrayal to occur. I’m not going to lie; this process is essential (and challenging). Whether you are the person who caused the hurt or the one on the receiving end, you are bound to feel a mix of emotions: Angry, defensive, hopeless, numb. There is grief mixed up in healing a marriage. Grief for the couple you were. Grief for the dreams you fear you’ve lost. Being able to recognize this grief and accept it is the first step towards healing.
Rethink your definition of what makes love last. No relationship class would be complete without challenging the damaging stereotypes and myths that abound in our society regarding love. If you are going to heal your heart, it’s essential to consider if your beliefs and ideas about relationships help love or hurt it.
“From the breadth and depth of her own study and knowledge, Kerry continually knows when to guide us with answers and when to challenge us to take the next step on our own. Many thanks! ”
Here’s the fun part, where you consolidate gains and reap the fruits of your efforts – taking your newfound skills, insights, and connections and shifting your focus toward amplifying positivity, co-creating a relationship contract, and finalizing a shared narrative. This module is all about imbuing hard memories with meaning, insight, and generosity. You get to rewrite your story together, and it’s radically different from the story you started with.
This module’s beauty is that even if you have a partner who does not participate in Crisis to Connected™ with you, you will still learn, grow, and become more skillful. You will get to write the story of your life –past, present, and future. You will be empowered, have clarity, and find peace previously not possible.
- Starting with the sweet stuff, you’ll discover research-backed tools for keeping your love alive, enhancing play and novelty, and (important) how to maintain a strong positive connection that endures even when life gets bumpy.
- Create a shared contract by hashing out the basic rules to govern your relationship in the days and years to come. For relationships to thrive, they must be fair and just. They must emphasize mutuality. Equally important, your core agreements must be upheld by both of you because when one person deviates from your contract, the guiding principles do not genuinely exist.
- Create a contract with yourself. I understand how important love is. When we fear losing it or potentially never finding it (again), we are vulnerable to breaking promises to ourselves and striking a deal with the devil. If you’ve done Crisis to Connected™ solo, chances are you’ve walked this path. Going forward, it’s essential to make a contract with yourself, one that ensures you hold to your core values, bring your best, and never let fear override healthy choices and self-care.
- Finally, you will craft a radically different story than the one you began Crisis to Connected™ with. This is a story that frees you (and your partner) from the role of persecutor, victim, or rescuer. It’s a narrative that incorporates the whole of your history and memories, that is disengaged from blame and emphasizes insight and accountability.
This is a story laced with meaning and generosity, that dissolves resentment and nurtures love. It will be the story you tell your children and your grandchildren, and as such, it will benefit generations to come.
While each class will be live-streamed, you are not required to attend it live. A recording of each class will be available in your online classroom via video within 24-hours of the live presentation weekly.
Money Back GuaranteeYou’ll be backed by a Risk-Free 14-Day Guarantee.
Let me say this upfront.
Crisis 2 Connected™ is the most comprehensive program available for overcoming relationship crises, transcending stuck patterns, and rebuilding trust. I promise that the methods in C2C, when practiced and applied, will move you from feeling utterly stuck and hopeless to feeling clear and empowered –experiencing the best version of you when faced with conflict, shutdown, betrayal, and heartache.
I’m committed to this class being a game-changer for you. I get how painful it is to have your relationship be hurting, so I’m giving you everything I’ve got.
You’ll receive everything I give my private retreat couples, including customizable insights, knowledge, tools, videos, exercises, downloadable audio files, PDFs, resources, and live support.
However, if you are not feeling it by the end of 14 days –If for whatever reason there has been no change or improvement, simply reach out, and I’ll refund your investment in full.
“I’ve spent many hours with Kerry Lusignan, personally experiencing her integrity, devotion, warmth, skill, and soulfulness. She has uncommonly good instincts about what intimate partners need to improve their relationships. Across the years, she refined her instincts by training with the most well-recognized experts in the field of couples therapy. If you are looking for a top-tier couples therapist, you have found the right person.”
KERRY LUSIGNAN, MA, LMHC
I’m a Couples Therapist and Relationship Expert with all the certifications, degrees, and publications to boot. But more importantly, I’m a real person who believes in humor, salt-of-the-earth values, life experience, and kindness.
I run the gamut from silly to serious. I wholeheartedly believe that grief is the sister to love. When we make peace with heartache and muster courage, freedom, and joy are just around the corner.
C2C is my invitation to you. I’m asking you to run headlong into heartbreak with me, to step into the arena and aim to connect with yourself, with common humanity, and ultimately, with Love on its terms.
Questions? Let’s talk via VideoAsk.
“It was an EXCELLENT course. I have referred several friends. My biggest regret is that we didn’t take it 30 years ago.”
Can a digital relationship course be anywhere near as effective as couples therapy?
And you know what? This excites me to no end. I’m so tired of this information being sequestered to the therapist’s couch, limited to boutique practices and the privileged few. Here’s the deal ––you have the power, and there are a lot of ways to heal your heart that do not involve therapy (and the irony is not lost on me as I’m saying this as a Couples Therapist).
There’s NO way my partner will participate in a relationship course; given that, how can this course be helpful?
We know from the research that how you respond to your partner at any given moment frequently results in getting more of the same. More of the same affection or coldness. More of the same cooperation or obstinance. More of the same connection or shutdown. Knowing how to respond to your partner is critical, especially if you are in a relationship with someone who isn’t cooperating. I’ve designed Crisis to Connected™ to be equally effective for individuals –because I know there are many couples with reluctant and leaning out spouses. I’d even say I’ve created this course, especially for you ––because I get the pain that comes with being alone while partnered.
Will Kerry be available and accessible to answer my questions if I get stuck?
I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed by all of the things I’m going to need to learn and execute inside this program. Are you sure this is doable?
When I join Crisis to Connected™, will I get instant access to all of the lessons and modules?
Still thinking about it?
I used to talk to people about the multitude of costs incurred when we don’t invest in our relationship’s health –when we avoid change or taking a risk. What I’ve learned over the years is that most of you are well aware of the costs of heartache, conflict, and divorce. Now more than ever, our relationships are encountering challenges. So the last thing you need is me trying to convince you or scare you into acting.
Because whether you’re in a lonely relationship where you and your spouse are living parallel lives, or you’re dealing with a full-blown marital crisis, if you’re reading this, chances are you’re well aware that stakes are high and life is short. That something has to change. That your living as you are, in loneliness or distress, is not tenable for the long-haul unless something shifts soon.
The number one problem couples I surveyed in creating Crisis to Connected™ cited was being STUCK. Not knowing how to move forward and simultaneously feeling like they couldn’t go back. Like they were in relationship limbo-hell –having the same-old fights. Like their lives are Groundhog Day meets War of the Roses.
I want to encourage you to give Crisis to Connected™ a shot because the only thing harder than change is stuckness, and with my 14-Day Risk-Free guarantee, there’s little to lose and so much to gain.
I personally cannot wait to guide you through Crisis to Connected and share all of the resources with you.
I’ve experienced firsthand what it feels like to transition from stuck to unstuck. To be free of old patterns, bad habits, fear, and hopelessness. I GET how much it hurts when your relationship is not working. How loneliness is amped when your partner is sitting next to you, but you might as well be miles away.
There’s a saying in my field –Every family that needs a therapist raises a therapist. This means that my passion for cracking the code to achieving relationship health is personal and professional. That I value life experience and wholeheartedly believe love is the answer.
Over the past ten years, I’ve grown a business that is one of a kind. A center that has treated over one thousand couples to date and specializes exclusively in couples’ work. That is renowned for integrating the leading models in relationship wellness: Gottman Method, Emotionally Focused, The Daring Way,™, and Pragmatic Experiential Couples Therapy.
I’ve traveled all over the country and trained with the leaders in each of these techniques. As a result, couples worldwide come to my center to experience the gains and benefits from our proprietary approach.
The reality is, the demand is far greater than what I’ve been able to provide until now.
Should you choose to accept my invitation, I personally guarantee that the next two months will be completely life-changing.
Join the Waitlist for C2C
“We were extremely fortunate to find Kerry at a critical time in our relationship. For more than six months, we had been struggling through a crisis totally on our own when we found Crisis to Connected. Kerry’s consideration and ability to distill key insights has made all the difference to where we are as a couple today.”
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